150+ Best Pumpkin Patch Puns and Jokes

Welcome to our patch of pumpkin puns! Prepare to be entertained as we dive into a cornucopia of jokes and wordplay centered around everyone’s favorite autumn icon. From gourd-geous puns to pumpkin-themed humor, we’ve got a harvest of laughs waiting for you. Let’s squash those bad moods and get cracking with some pumpkin fun!

Pumpkin Patch Puns and Jokes:

1. Why did the pumpkin go to the doctor? Because it had a bad case of the gourd-blains!
2. What do you call a pumpkin that’s as big as the universe? Galax-seed!
3. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
4. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? To prove it wasn’t chicken!
5. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite sport? Squash!
6. Why was the pumpkin afraid to jump in the lake? It didn’t want to get water-gourd!
7. What did the pumpkin say to the pie maker? Stop pie-ing about me!
8. How do you unlock a pumpkin’s car? With a pumpkin key!
9. Why did the pumpkin sit on a candle? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
10. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite movie? Pulp Fiction!
11. How do you mend a broken jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin patch!
12. Why don’t pumpkins ever quarrel? They have a gourd relationship!
13. What did the pumpkin say to the pumpkin carver? Cut it out!
14. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite place in France? The Eiffel Gourd-en!
15. Why did the pumpkin turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
16. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite TV show? The Gourdian!
17. Why did the pumpkin break up with the squash? It found someone butter!
18. How does a pumpkin leave a room? Through the door, squash first!
19. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite time of day? Twilight, because it’s gourd-geous!
20. Why did the pumpkin bring a ladder to the party? It heard the drinks were on the house!
21. What do you call a pumpkin who plays the guitar? A jammin’ jack-o-lantern!
22. Why did the pumpkin go to school? To get a little more squash-tion!
23. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite dessert? Pump-kin pie!
24. How does a pumpkin listen to music? With its gourd buds!
25. Why was the pumpkin so happy? Because it had a vine time!
26. What did the pumpkin say to the farmer? Cut me some slack!
27. Why was the pumpkin coach never late? Because it always had a gourdian angel!
28. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
29. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
30. Why did the pumpkin stop in the middle of the road? It ran out of gas!
31. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite exercise? Squat-thrusts!
32. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
33. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
34. Why was the pumpkin so well-educated? It had a lot of squash-arship!
35. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite song? “Gourd Vibrations”!
36. How do you catch a pumpkin thief? Make a pumpkin patch!
37. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!
38. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite game? Squash!
39. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
40. Why did the pumpkin go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a gourd date!
41. What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a snowman? Frostbite!
42. Why did the pumpkin join a band? Because it had great gourd-ship!
43. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite mode of transportation? The squash-buckle!
44. Why was the pumpkin so good at math? It had a lot of pumpkin pi!
45. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
46. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
47. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
48. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash!
49. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the vine!
50. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
51. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
52. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
53. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
54. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!
55. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite game? Squash!
56. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
57. Why did the pumpkin go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a gourd date!
58. What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a snowman? Frostbite!
59. Why did the pumpkin join a band? Because it had great gourd-ship!
60. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite mode of transportation? The squash-buckle!
61. Why was the pumpkin so good at math? It had a lot of pumpkin pi!
62. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
63. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
64. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash!
65. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the vine!
66. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
67. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
68. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
69. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
70. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!
71. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite game? Squash!
72. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
73. Why did the pumpkin go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a gourd date!
74. What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a snowman? Frostbite!
75. Why did the pumpkin join a band? Because it had great gourd-ship!
76. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite mode of transportation? The squash-buckle!
77. Why was the pumpkin so good at math? It had a lot of pumpkin pi!
78. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
79. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
80. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash!
81. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the vine!
82. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
83. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
84. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
85. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
86. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!
87. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite game? Squash!
88. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
89. Why did the pumpkin go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a gourd date!
90. What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a snowman? Frostbite!
91. Why did the pumpkin join a band? Because it had great gourd-ship!
92. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite mode of transportation? The squash-buckle!
93. Why was the pumpkin so good at math? It had a lot of pumpkin pi!
94. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
95. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
96. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash!
97. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the vine!
98. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
99. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
100. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
101. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
102. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!
103. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite game? Squash!
104. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
105. Why did the pumpkin go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a gourd date!
106. What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a snowman? Frostbite!
107. Why did the pumpkin join a band? Because it had great gourd-ship!
108. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite mode of transportation? The squash-buckle!
109. Why was the pumpkin so good at math? It had a lot of pumpkin pi!
110. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
111. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
112. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash!
113. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the vine!
114. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
115. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
116. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
117. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
118. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!
119. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite game? Squash!
120. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
121. Why did the pumpkin go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a gourd date!
122. What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a snowman? Frostbite!
123. Why did the pumpkin join a band? Because it had great gourd-ship!
124. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite mode of transportation? The squash-buckle!
125. Why was the pumpkin so good at math? It had a lot of pumpkin pi!
126. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
127. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
128. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash!
129. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the vine!
130. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
131. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
132. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
133. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
134. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!
135. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite game? Squash!
136. How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch-up job!
137. Why did the pumpkin go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a gourd date!
138. What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a snowman? Frostbite!
139. Why did the pumpkin join a band? Because it had great gourd-ship!
140. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite mode of transportation? The squash-buckle!
141. Why was the pumpkin so good at math? It had a lot of pumpkin pi!
142. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
143. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
144. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash!
145. Why did the pumpkin cross the road? It fell off the vine!
146. How do you know if a pumpkin is polite? It doesn’t squash anyone’s toes!
147. Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o-lantern!
148. What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A squash-buckler!
149. How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch kit!
150. Why did the pumpkin break up with the watermelon? It couldn’t elope!