Relationships are important for all but also keeping the right relationship matters a lot. A relationship between a teacher and a student is important because it helps the Student build confidence in studying and it also makes learning easy and not tiring but this relationship must be purpose-driven, in which the only purpose should be educational related.. No party should do anything to jeopardize such relationship. In this article we shall see Why is it wrong for teachers to date students?
Now, the idea of a teacher dating a student is a really bad one especially when the student is directly under the supervision if the Teacher. If things turn out poorly, each party has a share of whatever consequences comes with it.
Why Is Dating A Teacher Bad?
A teacher is one who holds power and authority and therefore a relationship with a student that isn’t built on educational purpose is wrong and it may cause abuse of power and authority. Abuse of power in the sense that, it is possible that a teacher can cross boundaries just to favor that particular student even if it is obvious that the student is wrong, but because they are emotionally attached, the student can do no wrong in his eyes.
Conflict if interest may also arise when a teacher’s professional responsibilities is shakened by a special personal relationship shared with his student. It is always better to shun such relationship because it can compromise learning environment.
Drawbacks Of Dating A Teacher
There’s nothing more destructive to the educational system than sexual activities between a teacher and a student at any level. Such behaviour can often disrupt learning, cost the teacher his job, cost both parties their self- respect. It can affect learning in the sense that the teacher Attitude also affects the attitude of the students in the classroom. When students become suspicious of a particular student and teacher, it increases curiosity among Students and this draws their attention away from learning when that particular lecturer is in the classroom.
The Problems Associated With a Student Dating a Teacher.
There are some problems associated with a teacher dating a student but to mention a few;
The first problem is The Problem of Impartiality. If a teacher is dating a student, the place of fairness and Impartiality is questioned when accessing such students’ education, that is, assignments, tests, presentation, and even examination. This is because the teacher can decide to give an unfair advantage over other students who even put in more work. This is where favouritism comes to play. With this, the teacher has robbed other students off their real assessments and also, the real evaluation of the student involved with the teacher is not known. Thus may cause hardworking students to derail from the correct path.
A teacher and Student involvement with each other can lead to sexual harassment and even sexual intercourse which is totally wrong because it promotes premarital sex.. A teacher is supposed to protect these students from such abuses, therefore, it is considered wrong for a teacher to be found guilty if the same crime. This action in a way exposes the student to a lot of other vices and might also lure some of her counterpart into engaging in such act so as to feel among or not be down with low self-esteem. Exposure to Sexual harassment leads to physical, psychological and professional consequences for individuals. E.g. irritation, anger, discomfort, stress, feeling of powerlessness and degradation.
An unpurposive relationship between a student and a teacher is seen as violation of Policies of certain institution which can also lead to serious consequences. The teacher could lose his job, the teacher’s reputation is also stained with immorality.
Why Should It Be Avoided?
There are a good number of reasons as to why a teacher dating a student is very wrong
Firstly, it is harmful to the weaker party in the long term. For example;
What if they break up and the news breaks out in school and it becomes the topic of discussion on every lip in school and the student in question cannot deal with the trauma of the breakup and decides to withdraw from school?
What if the teacher connives with his other colleagues and they all lie against the student and say it is a case of seduction and the student is expelled while the teacher is just punished for a short period?
What if they breakup and the student tells everyone they only dated because the teacher threatened to fail her in class?
There are situations where a student- teacher relationship can work but there is so much that can go wrong, so it is better to be on the safe side and avoid such entanglement.
Secondly, thus relationship between a teacher and student should be avoided because it betrays the goal of the latter relationship which is the pursuit of education. It undermines and brings disrespect to the teaching profession. The goal of teaching is to educate the students and not to get canal knowledge of them because it is possible that one party becomes more interested in the sex than sharing of knowledge and developing intellectual and personal skills.
In the real sense, teachers take the place of God in the lives of students as they are fondly called ‘second parents’. Teachers are mentors, they guide students in the right path, they are role models for Students, they are the ones who instill values in the life of student.
What then can we say, if a teacher is romantically involved with his Student? It is wrong because they teacher is not adding value to the life of the student.
Just like it is wrong for a boss to date his subordinate, it is also wrong for teachers to date students because ant drastic decision taken but either the boss or the teacher when the relationship is going poorly, affects the subordinate and Student greatly.
Now, we’ll be discussing the types of friendships and the kind of friendship that should exist between a teacher and a student.
In one of The Works of Aristotle, he distinguished between the 3 types of friendships which are;
- Pleasure Friendship (which are just for enjoying and entertainment)
- Utility Friendship (which is about achieving some goals and objectives with another person’s assistance)
- Virtue Friendship ( which is about engaging in mutually beneficial activities and appreciating the other person in their own right, not just for pleasure)
What Significance Does This Have For Teacher-student relationship?
It is fair to say that the utility friendship is the best friendship to exist between a teacher and a student as long as it is associated with the goal of education.
The friendship is about the teacher assisting the student in achieving educational goals and also becoming a better person. As part of utility friendship, the teachers shouldn’t be hostile but should be tolerant and civil. If there’s too much tension between them, the aim is defeated.
Conclusion
Teachers should promote and uphold healthy relationship with their students because they have the ability to build students that are potential stars or tear them down and shatter their dreams.
