Usually, we take compliments as a nice comment to receive. They often make you feel good, as they are said specifically to highlight a special characteristic of a person. These are thought to come from a good intention. Lets find out how to reply to unwanted to compliments?
Many people go in search of a good compliment, others feel uncomfortable when they receive them, and some others simply don’t understand them or don’t see the need to say them.
Here below, we’re talking about those awkward moments when a single comment can ruin your day or simply offend you.
Those complements that no one wanted to hear, and how to respond to them.
General tips to reply to an unwanted compliment
Without being disrespectful, angry, or even spiteful to the person. Here are some tips for beginners:
∙ Don’t take it personally
∙ Understand the compliment
∙ Respond it with respect
∙ What to do if you already retort with disrespect?
∙ Return the compliment
∙ Confrontation
It may have been a lot of information, like pieces of a puzzle scattered all over the place. Let’s uncover each step to help you figure out how to replicate an unwanted compliment.
Don’t take it personally
Yes, this advice means that you’re going to have to let go of a little of your pride.
The thing is, we as human beings are complex, underneath each of us is a whole world, not to say universe.
What to do so that you don’t take it personally?
1. Breathe for just a second, and allow yourself to let the other person know that their comment made you uncomfortable.
2. Give the person the benefit of the doubt: Going back to the fact that we mentioned, the complexity of the human being, it is better not to act quickly on the defensive if you are not sure that the other person has meant to offend you.
3. Reverse psychology: It has been said that actions speak louder than words. So just let it go, and try not to be offended by comments out of place.
Figure out the compliment
Philosophy and its theories are based on wanting to get to the truth, the source, and the core of everything in its totality.
So theorists, by nature, look in their heads for an explanation. They consider themselves analysts and questioners? Do you identify with that kind of thinking?
If you just nodded your head, then these few tips are for you:
1. Ask: if you are as analytic as the description before, so you won’t be afraid to ask for an explanation about the reason why for the unwanted compliment.
2. Analyze the person: Whoever gave you the unwanted compliment, if you instantly know that it speaks more about that person than it does about you, let it go and avoid an existential crisis.
3. Analyze yourself: sometimes when a comment bothers us it’s because it’s the truth, and deep down we know it. So instead of being proud, be wise and take it as advice.
Even if it’s sometimes uncomfortable to decipher an unwanted compliment, it’s always better to dare to get to the reality of things.
And if you’re an analytical person, don’t be afraid to probe with kindness. It’s necessary.
Respond it with respect
It may be possible that an unwanted compliment is unwanted because it hurt our feelings or just made us angry because it was unpleasant. So in the moment of heat…how to reply with respect?
1. Don’t yell: try to control your emotions, yelling is not going to help anyone, and you will probably regret it later.
2. Be the bigger person: If the person in front of you intends to hurt you, simply excuse yourself to another place. And know that you were better than the sender of the comment.
What to do if you already retort with disrespect?
If you already were rude and there is nothing left to do: apologize.
Be honest and avoid making excuses for your rudeness, after all, what’s done is done. So instead of wasting your time offending the other person, you could respond like this:
1. “I’m sorry for my reaction, it’s just that your comment threw me off and upset me. I didn’t mean to be disrespectful to you, it won’t happen again”.
Although it may seem simple, sometimes, when we have a misunderstanding, it is enough to ask for forgiveness.
Return the compliment
If you don’t want to delve into the subject (sometimes it’s wiser), reply with another well-meaning compliment.
Sometimes it’s as easy as forgive and forget.
Confrontation
The confrontational alternative to responding to an unwanted compliment is for the moment when you are certain that the comment was said to damage your integrity or humiliate you.
When you have to speak up for your dignity, you may have to be tough.
To stay quiet not always talks about a peaceful person, but of someone that doesn’t stand out for himself, and that’s not right.
Often we need to speak up, and these are a few ways to reply:
1. Be honest: if you felt attacked, say, “I’m sorry…you have a problem with me? that complement seemed uncalled for, and honestly…it was a little rude.”
2. Without getting too excited, respond with, “That didn’t seem like a compliment to me, it annoyed me, please don’t refer to me that way again.”
3. You can also reply like: “I don’t feel identify with your compliment, but I would like to know what got you to say that to me?”
In conclusion, these are a few ways to respond to those unwanted compliments that often make us feel uncomfortable, angry, or misunderstood.
Remember to be wise and patient, knowing how to respond to those unwanted compliments. Sometimes the answer is simple.
Finally, remember that uncomfortable comment you said in the past, and how you learned to be better.
It is as complex as being understanding and having the discernment to know when it is time to stand up for yourself.
