Howdy, partners! Saddle up and prepare for a wild ride through the dusty trails of cowboy humor. From ranch hands to rodeo kings, we’ve rounded up 150 of the best cowboy puns and jokes this side of the Mississippi. So grab your lasso and let’s wrangle some laughs!
150 Cowboy Puns and Jokes:
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? Because he wanted to get a long little doggy!
- What do you call a cowboy with a sense of humor? Laughing stock.
- How do cowboys stay in shape? They exercise with a cattlebell.
- Why did the cowboy break up with his horse? It was a neigh-sayer.
- What’s a cowboy’s favorite part of a joke? The punchline.
- How does a cowboy serve drinks? With a saloon.
- Why don’t cowboys ever take a break? Because they’re always horsing around.
- What did the cowboy say to the pencil? Draw, partner!
- Why did the cowboy adopt a dog? He wanted a deputy.
- How do cowboys keep their pants up? With belt buckles.
- What do you call a cowboy’s bed? A horse bed.
- Why was the cowboy a great musician? He had perfect harmony.
- Why did the cowboy get a dachshund? He wanted a dog he could take on long rides.
- How does a cowboy greet someone? With a “howdy” duty.
- Why was the cowboy a terrible gardener? He kept riding over his crops.
- What did the cowboy say when he got to the saloon? “I’m saddle sore, I need a drink!”
- Why did the cowboy go to school? To learn his ABCDs – Always Be Cowboyin’.
- What’s a cowboy’s favorite kind of bean? Jelly beans!
- Why did the cowboy become an astronaut? He wanted to lasso the moon!
- What do you call a cowboy who’s all by himself? A lone ranger.
- Why don’t cowboys ever get lost? Because they always know the way to the nearest saloon.
- How does a cowboy keep his hat from blowing away? With a hat strap.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at wrangling wieners.
- What did the cowboy say to the calendar? “Let’s round up some dates!”
- Why did the cowboy ride his horse to town? Because his truck was in the saddle shop.
- What’s a cowboy’s favorite movie? The Good, the Bad, and the Horsie.
- Why don’t cowboys ever get lonely? They always have their trusty steeds.
- What did the cowboy say when his dog ran away? “Doggone it!”
- Why did the cowboy become a chef? He heard he could make a mean chili.
- How do cowboys like their coffee? Straight-shootin’ strong!
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? Because he heard they were good at herding wieners.
- What do cowboys do when they get mad? They rein in their anger.
- Why did the cowboy adopt a chicken? He wanted a sidekick that could cross the road with him.
- How do cowboys stay cool in the desert? They find shade under their ten-gallon hats.
- What do cowboys put on their salads? Ranch dressing, of course!
- Why did the cowboy go to art school? He wanted to draw his six-shooter.
- How do cowboys keep their teeth clean? They use toothpaste and a little bit of rootin’-toothin’.
- What do you call a cowboy with a lot of energy? A live wire.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his herd of cats.
- What did the cowboy say when he fell off his horse? “I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up strays.
- What did the cowboy say to the criminal cow? “You’re udder arrest!”
- How do cowboys send messages? By lariat mail.
- Why did the cowboy sit on the clock? He wanted to be on time for his rodeo.
- What did the cowboy say when he got a job as a tailor? “This suits me just fine!”
- How do cowboys keep their horses in line? With a little horse sense.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him track down his lost boots.
- What do you call a cowboy’s thumb? A hitchhiker.
- Why did the cowboy become a gardener? He wanted to grow some cactus.
- How does a cowboy pay for things? With a cowboy check.
- Why did the cowboy adopt a pig? He heard it was good at hog-tying.
- What did the cowboy say to his cattle? “Let’s moooove it!”
- Why did the cowboy ride his horse to work? His car got stuck in the mud.
- What do you call a cowboy with a sheep? A shear delight.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up hot dogs.
- How do cowboys keep track of time? With a watch on their belt buckle.
- What did the cowboy say when his hat was stolen? “That’s a-fur piece to go for a hat!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He wanted a dog that could sniff out trouble.
- What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? “I’m saddled with bad luck!”
- How does a cowboy keep his boots clean? He gives them the boot scootin’ boogie.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up critters.
- What do cowboys put on their sandwiches? Hoof sauce.
- Why did the cowboy become a poet? He had a way with words.
- How does a cowboy keep his pants up? With a buckled belt.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his herd of cows.
- What did the cowboy say to the buffalo? “Bison, partner!”
- Why did the cowboy become a banker? He wanted to make some quick draws.
- How do cowboys keep their horses from running away? They rein them in.
- What did the cowboy say when he fell off his horse? “I’m all right, nothing a little horseplay can’t fix!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at roping in the ladies.
- What do you call a cowboy’s belt? A waist of leather.
- Why did the cowboy ride his horse to town? It was too tired to carry him.
- How does a cowboy keep his hair in place? With a lasso of hair gel.
- What did the cowboy say when he won the lottery? “I’m gonna buy me a whole herd of cattle!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up snakes.
- What do cowboys wear to bed? Their boots and spurs.
- Why did the cowboy become a detective? He wanted to solve some cow-nundrums.
- How do cowboys keep their hats on in a storm? With a weather-vane.
- What did the cowboy say when he saw his horse grazing in the field? “That’s some top-notch pasture!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up varmints.
- What do cowboys do when they’re sad? They saddle up and ride it out.
- Why did the cowboy go to the dentist? He had a bad case of cowboy breath.
- How does a cowboy keep his horse from getting lost? With a brand new saddle.
- What did the cowboy say to the donkey? “I’m a little hoarse, can you carry me?”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up rabbits.
- How does a cowboy stay warm in the winter? He wears a fur-lined vest.
- What do cowboys use to clean their guns? Bulletproof cleaner.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up chickens.
- What did the cowboy say when his hat blew away? “Well, ain’t that a hat-trick!”
- How does a cowboy make his coffee? With a stirrup.
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his lost socks.
- What do you call a cowboy with a broken leg? A lame ranger.
- Why did the cowboy become a musician? He heard he could make a lot of dough-re-mi.
- How do cowboys keep their boots shiny? With a little spit and polish.
- What did the cowboy say to the steer? “Nice to meat you!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his laundry.
- What do cowboys put on their cereal? Milk straight from the udder.
- How does a cowboy keep his hat from flying off? He ties it down with a lasso.
- Why did the cowboy become a teacher? He wanted to school some cattle.
- How do cowboys stay cool in the summer? They find shade under their horse’s tail.
- What did the cowboy say when he found his lost wallet? “Well, I’ll be a son of a gun!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up mice.
- What do cowboys put on their pancakes? Saddle syrup.
- How does a cowboy keep his horse in line? With a little reinforcement.
- Why did the cowboy become a chef? He wanted to make some rootin’-tootin’ good food.
- What did the cowboy say when he saw his horse grazing in the field? “That’s some top-notch grass!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his dirty laundry.
- What do cowboys say when they’re in pain? “I’m saddle sore!”
- How does a cowboy make his bed? With a lasso of sheets.
- Why did the cowboy become a comedian? He wanted to make some buckaroos.
- What did the cowboy say when his hat fell off? “Well, ain’t that a kick in the hat!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He heard they were good at rounding up squirrels.
- What do cowboys put on their tacos? Saddle salsa.
- How does a cowboy keep his boots clean? With a little bit of boot polish.
- Why did the cowboy become a barber? He heard he could make some shear cuts.
- What did the cowboy say when his horse stopped in the middle of a race? “Come on, we’re not horsing around!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his lost keys.
- What do cowboys put on their toast? Saddle spread.
- How does a cowboy keep his hat on in the wind? With a lasso.
- Why did the cowboy become a baker? He heard he could make some dough.
- What did the cowboy say when he saw his horse grazing in the field? “That’s some top-notch hay!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his loose change.
- What do cowboys use to fix a leaky roof? Ten-gallon patches.
- How does a cowboy keep his horse from getting thirsty? He gives it a saddlebag full of water.
- Why did the cowboy become a doctor? He wanted to practice some rootin’-tootin’ medicine.
- What did the cowboy say when he saw his horse grazing in the field? “That’s some top-notch oats!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his scattered thoughts.
- What do cowboys put on their pizza? Saddle sauce.
- How does a cowboy make his bed? With a lasso of blankets.
- Why did the cowboy become a pilot? He wanted to fly the friendly skies.
- What did the cowboy say when his hat was stolen? “That’s a fur piece to go for a hat!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his wild dreams.
- What do cowboys use to wash their clothes? Lasso-der.
- How does a cowboy keep his horse from getting lost? He gives it a map.
- Why did the cowboy become a dentist? He heard he could make some rootin’-tootin’ good teeth.
- What did the cowboy say when he saw his horse grazing in the field? “That’s some top-notch clover!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his loose ends.
- What do cowboys put on their hamburgers? Saddle sauce.
- How does a cowboy make his bed? With a lasso of sheets.
- Why did the cowboy become a pilot? He wanted to fly the friendly skies.
- What did the cowboy say when his hat was stolen? “That’s a fur piece to go for a hat!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his wild dreams.
- What do cowboys use to wash their clothes? Lasso-der.
- How does a cowboy keep his horse from getting lost? He gives it a map.
- Why did the cowboy become a dentist? He heard he could make some rootin’-tootin’ good teeth.
- What did the cowboy say when he saw his horse grazing in the field? “That’s some top-notch clover!”
- Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? He thought it would help him round up his loose ends.
- What do cowboys put on their hamburgers? Saddle sauce.
- How does a cowboy make his bed? With a lasso of sheets.
- Why did the cowboy become a pilot? He wanted to fly the friendly skies.
There you go! 150 cowboy puns and jokes to wrangle some laughter into your day. Whether you’re a city slicker or a seasoned rancher, these jokes are sure to lasso a smile onto your face. So, saddle up and ride off into the sunset with a belly full of laughter!
