150+ Best Chemistry Puns and Jokes

Welcome to our blog, where we’ll mix elements of humor and chemistry to create a reaction of laughter! Get ready to bond with these 150 puns and jokes that will make even the most stoichiometrically serious scientist crack a smile.

150+ Best Chemistry Puns and Jokes:

1. Why did the chemist go to jail? Because he couldn’t put his ion!
2. Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just couldn’t put it down!
3. What do you call an acid with an attitude? A-mean-oh acid!
4. Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber? Because he wanted to reduce his carbon footprint!
5. What did the scientist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe!
6. Why did the chemist take a test tube to bed? Because he wanted to sleep like a log!
7. How do you make a benzene ring laugh? Tell it a joke with a punchline!
8. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
9. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
10. What’s a chemist’s favorite tree? The catalpa tree, because it’s always branching out!
11. Why are chemists excellent for solving problems? They have all the solutions!
12. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
13. What did the chemist say when he found two new isotopes of helium? HeHe!
14. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
15. What did the chemist say when he found two new isotopes of helium? HeHe!
16. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
17. Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just couldn’t put it down!
18. Why can’t you trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
19. Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he left the singles bar? He got Avogadro’s number!
20. Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber? Because he wanted to reduce his carbon footprint!
21. What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? “You may have graduated, but I’ve got many degrees!”
22. What did one charged atom say to the other? I’ve got my ion you!
23. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
24. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
25. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
26. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
27. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
28. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
29. What do you call an educated tube? A graduated cylinder!
30. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
31. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
32. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
33. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
34. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
35. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
36. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
37. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
38. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
39. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
40. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
41. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
42. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
43. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
44. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
45. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
46. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
47. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
48. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
49. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
50. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
51. What did the biologist wear to impress their date? Designer genes!
52. Why can’t you trust atoms? They make up everything!
53. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
54. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
55. What do you call a benzene ring where the carbon atoms are replaced with iron? A ferrous wheel!
56. Why did the chemist coat his shoes with silicone rubber? He wanted to reduce his carbon footprint!
57. How did the chemist survive the famine? By subsisting on titrations!
58. What do you call a clown who’s also a chemist? A silicon!
59. What did one ion say to the other? I’ve got my ion you!
60. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
61. How many moles are in a guacamole? Avocado’s number!
62. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
63. Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-bell prize!
64. Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber? He wanted to reduce his carbon footprint!
65. What did one charged atom say to the other? I’ve got my ion you!
66. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
67. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
68. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
69. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
70. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
71. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
72. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
73. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
74. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
75. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
76. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
77. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
78. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
79. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
80. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
81. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
82. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
83. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
84. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
85. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
86. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
87. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
88. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
89. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
90. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
91. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
92. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
93. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
94. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
95. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
96. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
97. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
98. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
99. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
100. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
101. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
102. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
103. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
104. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
105. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
106. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
107. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
108. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
109. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
110. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
111. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
112. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
113. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
114. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
115. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
116. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
117. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
118. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
119. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
120. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
121. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
122. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
123. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
124. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
125. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
126. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
127. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
128. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
129. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
130. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
131. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
132. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
133. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
134. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
135. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
136. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
137. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!
138. Why did the acid go to the gym? It wanted to become a buffer solution!
139. What happened to the chemist who was exposed to alpha particles? He became an alpha male!
140. Why did the chemist only work in his laboratory in winter? Because his assistant said it was freezing cold!
141. Why did the noble gas cry? Because all its friends argon!
142. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
143. Why did the chemist put his flask in the blender? To make a reaction smoothie!
144. How do you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before going!
145. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates!
146. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems? They have all the solutions!
147. What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!
148. Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He’s 0K now!
149. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!
150. What element is a girl’s future best friend? Carbon!