150+ Best Bagel Puns and Jokes

Welcome to the “Bagel Bonanza: A Dough-lightful Collection of Puns and Jokes!” Get ready to roll into a world of savory humor and toasted puns as we explore the dough-licious universe of bagels. From poppy seed puns to sesame humor, let’s spread some laughter, one schmear at a time!

150+ Best Bagel Puns and Jokes

Bagel Puns and Jokes:

  1. What did the bagel say to the loaf of bread? You’re toast!
  2. Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby.
  3. How do you make a bagel laugh? You knead it!
  4. What’s a bagel’s favorite dance move? The twist and roll!
  5. Why was the bagel crying? It was feeling lox of love.
  6. What did the bagel say to the cream cheese? You’re my butter half!
  7. Why did the bagel break up with the doughnut? It was tired of the hole relationship.
  8. How does a bagel answer the phone? “Dough-nut disturb!”
  9. What did the bagel say to the toaster? I’m getting a little toasty in here!
  10. Why don’t bagels like to fight? They prefer to keep things lox-key.
  11. How does a bagel say goodbye? It says, “I’m off to a-roll!”
  12. What’s a bagel’s favorite game? Bage-lot!
  13. Why was the bagel sad? It was feeling a bit crumby.
  14. What do you call a bagel that’s gone bad? Spoiled dough!
  15. Why did the bagel go to school? To get a little more edu-dough-cation!
  16. What did the bagel say to the dough? You’re on a roll!
  17. How does a bagel make friends? It gets toasted!
  18. What’s a bagel’s favorite type of music? Pop music!
  19. Why was the bagel cold? It was feeling a little under-baked!
  20. How do you know if a bagel is a magician? It always has a few tricks up its sleeve!
  21. What do you call a bagel that flies? A plain bagel-air!
  22. Why did the bagel go to outer space? It wanted to be the first bread in orbit!
  23. What’s a bagel’s favorite sport? Bagel-tennis!
  24. How do bagels stay in shape? They love to do dough crunches!
  25. What did the bagel say to the baseball bat? You’re on a roll!
  26. Why did the bagel go to the beach? It wanted to get a little toasty!
  27. How do you fix a broken bagel? With a little dough-votion!
  28. What’s a bagel’s favorite kind of movie? A roll-licking comedy!
  29. Why was the bagel feeling spicy? It had jalapeño cream cheese!
  30. What’s a bagel’s favorite place to travel? New York, of course!
  31. Why did the bagel go to the party? It heard it was going to be a jam!
  32. What’s a bagel’s favorite day of the week? Fry-day!
  33. Why did the bagel get a job at the bakery? It kneaded the dough!
  34. How does a bagel flirt? It uses its sesame charm!
  35. What did the bagel say to the loaf of bread? You’re inbred!
  36. Why was the bagel feeling blue? It was out of cream cheese!
  37. How does a bagel apologize? It says, “I’m sorry if I caused a lox of trouble!”
  38. What’s a bagel’s favorite Beatles song? “All You Knead Is Love”!
  39. Why did the bagel join the band? It wanted to be a part of the roll-call!
  40. How does a bagel get to work? On the gluten-free train!
  41. What do you call a bagel that can play the piano? A dough-minant seventh!
  42. Why did the bagel get a job as a detective? It wanted to solve the case of the missing lox!
  43. What’s a bagel’s favorite board game? Monotony!
  44. How does a bagel unlock its door? With a lox-and-key!
  45. What’s a bagel’s favorite kind of exercise? Cross-bread!
  46. Why did the bagel go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a date!
  47. What’s a bagel’s favorite dessert? A sweet roll!
  48. Why did the bagel go to the beach? It wanted to get a little toasty!
  49. How does a bagel keep its pants up? With a bread belt!
  50. What do you call a bagel that’s a big fan of the opera? A dough-ver-tenor!
  51. Why did the bagel go to school? It wanted to be a little more well-rounded!
  52. How does a bagel apologize? It says, “I’m sorry if I caused a lox of trouble!”
  53. What do you call a bagel that can fly? A plain bagel-air!
  54. Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby!
  55. How do you know if a bagel is a magician? It always has a few tricks up its sleeve!
  56. What’s a bagel’s favorite kind of math? Geometry — it loves to roll around in circles!
  57. Why was the bagel feeling lonely? It was missing its other dough-half!
  58. What did the bagel say to the coffee? You’re the cream to my cheese!
  59. How does a bagel end a relationship? It says, “We’re just not on the same roll anymore.”
  60. Why was the bagel sad? It was feeling a little lox-t.
  61. What do you call a bagel that can’t stop talking? A chatty dough-ball!
  62. Why did the bagel stop rolling? It ran out of dough!
  63. How does a bagel propose? With a carbo-ring!
  64. Why did the bagel go to school? It wanted to be a little more well-rounded!
  65. What’s a bagel’s favorite game? Doughter!
  66. How does a bagel show affection? With a dough-pe!
  67. Why did the bagel go to the beach? To get a little sun-baked!
  68. How does a bagel apologize? It says, “I’m sorry if I caused a lox of trouble!”
  69. What’s a bagel’s favorite movie? Loaves and Fishes!
  70. Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby!
  71. How does a bagel make friends? It gets toasted!
  72. What do you call a bagel that can’t swim? A sinker!
  73. Why did the bagel refuse to play hide-and-seek? It always got found in a crunch!
  74. How does a bagel tell time? It lox at the clock!
  75. Why did the bagel go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a date!
  76. What’s a bagel’s favorite animal? A dough-nut!
  77. Why was the bagel so happy? It was on a roll!
  78. How does a bagel get to work? By rolling!
  79. What do you call a bagel that’s famous? A roll model!
  80. Why did the bagel go to space? It wanted to be the first bread on the moon!
  81. How does a bagel stay in shape? It does a lot of bread-ups!
  82. What did the bagel say to the bread? You’re toast!
  83. How does a bagel answer the phone? With a roll-call!
  84. Why did the bagel go to school? To get a little bit more well-rounded!
  85. What do you call a bagel that can play guitar? A dough-stringer!
  86. How does a bagel play the lottery? With a roll of the dice!
  87. Why was the bagel scared? It heard it was going to get toasted!
  88. How does a bagel get a job? It fills out an a-dough-able application!
  89. What did the bagel say to the rolling pin? Stop rolling your eyes at me!
  90. Why did the bagel go to the gym? It wanted to get a little more well-rounded!
  91. How does a bagel propose? With a carbo-ring!
  92. What do you call a bagel that can’t stop talking? A chatty dough-ball!
  93. Why did the bagel go to school? It wanted to be a little more well-rounded!
  94. How does a bagel make friends? It gets toasted!
  95. What’s a bagel’s favorite type of math? Geometry — it loves to roll around in circles!
  96. Why was the bagel feeling lonely? It was missing its other dough-half!
  97. What did the bagel say to the coffee? You’re the cream to my cheese!
  98. How does a bagel end a relationship? It says, “We’re just not on the same roll anymore.”
  99. Why was the bagel sad? It was feeling a little lox-t.
  100. What do you call a bagel that can’t stop talking? A chatty dough-ball!
  101. Why did the bagel stop rolling? It ran out of dough!
  102. How does a bagel propose? With a carbo-ring!
  103. What’s a bagel’s favorite movie? Loaves and Fishes!
  104. Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby!
  105. How does a bagel make friends? It gets toasted!
  106. What do you call a bagel that can’t swim? A sinker!
  107. Why did the bagel refuse to play hide-and-seek? It always got found in a crunch!
  108. How does a bagel tell time? It lox at the clock!
  109. Why did the bagel go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a date!
  110. What’s a bagel’s favorite animal? A dough-nut!
  111. Why was the bagel so happy? It was on a roll!
  112. How does a bagel get to work? By rolling!
  113. What do you call a bagel that’s famous? A roll model!
  114. Why did the bagel go to space? It wanted to be the first bread on the moon!
  115. How does a bagel stay in shape? It does a lot of bread-ups!
  116. What did the bagel say to the bread? You’re toast!
  117. How does a bagel answer the phone? With a roll-call!
  118. Why did the bagel go to school? To get a little bit more well-rounded!
  119. What do you call a bagel that can play guitar? A dough-stringer!
  120. How does a bagel play the lottery? With a roll of the dice!
  121. Why was the bagel scared? It heard it was going to get toasted!
  122. How does a bagel get a job? It fills out an a-dough-able application!
  123. What did the bagel say to the rolling pin? Stop rolling your eyes at me!
  124. Why did the bagel go to the gym? It wanted to get a little more well-rounded!
  125. How does a bagel propose? With a carbo-ring!
  126. What do you call a bagel that can’t stop talking? A chatty dough-ball!
  127. Why did the bagel go to school? It wanted to be a little more well-rounded!
  128. How does a bagel make friends? It gets toasted!
  129. What’s a bagel’s favorite type of math? Geometry — it loves to roll around in circles!
  130. Why was the bagel feeling lonely? It was missing its other dough-half!
  131. What did the bagel say to the coffee? You’re the cream to my cheese!
  132. How does a bagel end a relationship? It says, “We’re just not on the same roll anymore.”
  133. Why was the bagel sad? It was feeling a little lox-t.
  134. What do you call a bagel that can’t stop talking? A chatty dough-ball!
  135. Why did the bagel stop rolling? It ran out of dough!
  136. How does a bagel propose? With a carbo-ring!
  137. What’s a bagel’s favorite movie? Loaves and Fishes!
  138. Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby!
  139. How does a bagel make friends? It gets toasted!
  140. What do you call a bagel that can’t swim? A sinker!
  141. Why did the bagel refuse to play hide-and-seek? It always got found in a crunch!
  142. How does a bagel tell time? It lox at the clock!
  143. Why did the bagel go to the party alone? It couldn’t find a date!
  144. What’s a bagel’s favorite animal? A dough-nut!
  145. Why was the bagel so happy? It was on a roll!
  146. How does a bagel get to work? By rolling!
  147. What do you call a bagel that’s famous? A roll model!
  148. Why did the bagel go to space? It wanted to be the first bread on the moon!
  149. How does a bagel stay in shape? It does a lot of bread-ups!
  150. What did the bagel say to the bread? You’re toast!